Wadeva happened the past few days before today, shall forget it.

     Today, it was my second time, throwing a hard one on my dearest first cum Co-Form class in Deyi, class 306. Was it that I'm just too weak to hold back the teary eyes from failing me, or too heartbroken when lecturing them??    I know it best...Its actually both!!

     It wasnt anytime of the chance that lecturing them so hard will ever make me feel relieved or confident that they will feel guilty or apologetic in their attitude towards everything, moreover, studies. These will be the last I expect from them or I will never want them to feel that way too. 
     I seriously dun need them to feel bad, guilty or apologetic towards me (or if they ever do in the first place)... What I want to see is their determination to do well in everything they encountered in life and the never say die spirit, or even, quit saying/thinking "I cannot do it!!"

     Lecturing them on behalf of their subject teachers, even Form has kinda given up on them, its really tiring. Complains after complains, about some of them, Im quite tired inside and immune to all the complains.. All I could do was to listen and digest and check out ways to bring across the expectations of the teachers. But, did the message get across to them? Or perhaps, MOST of them?? Second time!! My dear class, do you all really need a second time to wake up or worst, will I have to do a third time, fourth time, or MORE of the lecture den you ppl will finally come to your senses?!

I dunno, really really dunno... 
Perhaps...perhaps it could be my 2nd and last hard one on this class...

Can just grant me this simple wish? Dun ever let the teary eyes ever erupt again for u all can?? Wait till you people graduate from Deyi Sch, I will surely leave the last tear drop for you people and wish you all..and those will be tears of wishes, hopes and happiness for you all..Definitely it will be..

*I dun wan to and never wanted to lecture a hard one on you people again..really...Do you all realised that it really broke my heart, made me think through, whether all my effort, time and sacrifices I had for all of you, worth it??  Let me tell you all..its all worth it!!! What upset me was not the superficial things that were displayed , but the "feedback" I sensed from you all. It just reflects to me that what I said were all redundant and wasting of my energy.

De@r 306 kids, I really hope the best for you people and remembered what I ever told you all?
I will definitely be there helping and supporting you kids till you all move on to the next stage of your life (JC/Poly)...